I was reading this post on giving others a second chance by Shawn Murphy and was reminded of an incident which happened at home.
One day at the kitchen my wife noticed that the vessel containing cooking oil was almost empty. She immediately suspected the servant maid because only that morning she had filled it to brim. On inquiry – the maid initially expressed ignorance; then said the oil had spilled by mistake and she had wiped it off.
My wife reprimanded her for not keeping her informed earlier and let her off with a warning.
I felt that she had been harsh in cornering the maid – the warning was uncalled for & expressed as much. Mistakes happen with everyone. Even we spill things. the issue could have been resolved in a milder way without the maid having to lie and defend herself.
I feel our tendency to treat others harshly when we catch them doing a mistake is an offshoot of the way we treat ourselves. We are super critical of ourselves and go out of the way not to make any mistake and look foolish. we don’t give oursleves a second chance. In the process we become harsh on the people around us and deprive others of their deserved second chances.
Giving others a second chance or a third or fourth chance can be our way of expressing confidence and trust in the other person. Giving the person the bandwidth to grow in ability ,grow in the job and as an individual.